Lyrics: "Weather Advisory" (Verse 01).

This song will actually be on J-Pros' second album, Pacific Central. "Weather Advisory" touches on a handful of subjects personal to Reggie and me, including addressing various rumors circulating about my dealings in Seattle. It felt good to write.

People say I got issues, why'd I quit the scene
So soon in the game when our shit was mean
So close I could reach out, grip the dream
In my hands then transform it to cream

Hold up though, I was split between
Dealin' nicotine-laced lyrics to fiends
And handlin' a whole other pressure inside
No doubt, I was in for a hell of a ride

I can't stop the gossip, plug the rumors
Designed to hurt me like cuts or bruises
You wanna see Merc messed up? Guess what
You can all kick rocks, son, scuff ya Pumas

Say what you want, and direct all your weaponry
Against me -- you won't affect my trajectory
In fact, it'll just reflect that my destiny's
To keep keepin' on, so respect that and let it be

With that said, Happy Monday.

Make No Bones About It.

I continuously surprise myself at the realization of the distance I must travel in terms of self-improvement and, consequently, self-actualization. This distance was again put into sharp focus last week during (my final) Spring Break -- this usually happens when I have the much-needed privilege and responsibility of looking after Veronica. There's nothing quite like parenting to give you the proper perspective of your position in the world; it dawned on me as well that I needed to apply the lessons I learn while trying to be a good father to other aspects of my life.

Last week, it was reinforced to varying degrees that I need to keep working on my senses of patience, fairness, discipline, permissiveness, consistency and empathy (this is a big one). I've made reference to them before, but the lack of those skills contribute to much of my internal instability. I'm glad I've started to really recognize what my deficits are, when I used to just ignore/deny my faults (which did absolutely no one any good).

Well, my road to recovery begins with the admittance of my shortcomings, and the progress I will take to overcome them. This week I embark on that journey. It's time to face my skeletons. Fittingly (and kinda hilariously), a screenshot from one of the videogames of my childhood represents this well.

See you at the top.

Lyrics: "The Abyss" (Verse 02).

Written during an introspective, slightly depressed period some months ago. Some things have changed since then; some things haven't.

The road I'm travelin' is not necessarily the ideal one
But to deviate from the path is kinda fearsome
For real, son, 'cause I need to be the last man standing
Battle demons trying to pull me in the damn Grand Canyon

At times I swear they got another plan/Whenever I
Make a small advance, they pullin' me back like a rubber band
I want my soul to grow, but on the other hand
I'm addicted to hookers and blow 'cause yo what's a couple grand?

I'm throwin' money at a problem like that's gon' fix it
Everyone says that my priorities are so twisted
'Cause even when I know my bank account is in the low digits
Guess what I go do, get mo' lifted

The higher I climb, the farther I fall
And never cease to wonder why I even bother at all
'Cause when I look in the mirror, it's so absurd what I see
My doppelganger, the inverted version of me