The Gift Of Sight: Part 03.

Last in a 3-part series on my LASIK experience. Today's post is about the days and weeks after getting the surgery, and some thoughts on the entire experience. If you haven't done so already, catch up with Parts 01 and 02.

Over the next few days, I adjusted slowly to not wearing glasses anymore. I'd find myself forgetting at random times and instinctively reaching up towards my face to push my non-existent glasses up, or under them to scratch my nose. Upon waking up in the morning, I'd grope needlessly for them on the nightstand. Each time brought a smile or chuckle, and then amazement that I could actually read the clock beside me. Now, one month later, I still do those things on occasion -- I guess 30+ years of wearing specs is a hard habit to break.

I'm still putting in the saline drops, more so for keeping my eyes hydrated now than getting rid of dryness. The scratchiness in my left eye has all but disappeared, as the cornea has healed up nicely. So have the slight halos that used to appear around lights at nighttime (I was told these would go away anyway). I'm still pretty careful with rubbing my eyes or putting undue pressure on them, although my optometrist said that my eyes have returned to normal and I can rub them normally. It's just that I don't want to -- I kinda feel like treating them more gently from now on.

Overall, I'm having a blast. I don't have to worry about wiping my glasses if it rains while I'm outside, or during workouts when sweat drips onto them. I get to save money over my lifetime -- no more replacing frames and lenses every couple of years. I bought my first ever pair of real sunglasses (no more clip-ons!) two weeks ago! Yes this might be a mundane event for most people but to me it was A Momentous Occasion. Some people did double takes when they saw me glasses-less for the first time, but I think they've gotten used to it by now :) Honestly, it did take me a little while to get used to seeing my face unblocked by frames, but I really like how I look. My eyes are bigger than I thought!

So yes, I'm enjoying it very much.

I went back for my 3-week check-up and had my vision rated at a 20/15, which frankly amazed the hell out of me. I was advised that this would fluctuate back and forth for another couple of months before stabilizing, but I'm not one to complain. My 3-month follow-up appointment is in early September, and even if I go back to 20/20, that makes me more than happy. But for now, I can cut through steel with the lasers shooting out of my eyeballs.

a candid photo of me,
the day after surgery

To those of you born with perfect vision, you probably don't realize just how good you have it! (If you do, that's great :) It is such a blessing to have clear eyesight, and I made a promise to myself to never take my "new" eyes for granted. I still marvel at being able to see things crisply -- I went camping a couple of weeks ago and was able to really appreciate the night sky for the first time in my life. Please don't take that for granted!

And to those who are thinking about getting LASIK done, I really recommend doing so if you can afford it. Prices are going down all the time, and the treatments themselves are constantly improving with each innovation in the field. In my honest opinion, the potential benefits far outweigh any inherent risk from the procedure. I was definitely scared at first, but do your diligent research, find the clinic or doctor that's right for you, and go for it. The staff at the facility I chose was friendly, caring and very attentive to any concerns and questions I had. I'm quite pleased with the quality of pre- and post-op care I've received.

Let me know if you have any questions about my own experience. Thanks for reading!

The Gift Of Sight: Part 02.

Second in a 3-part series on my LASIK experience. Today's post is about the procedure itself. If you're even slightly squeamish about anything having to do with eyes, don't read this entry :) To those brave souls, read Part 01 then continue.

There were actually two operating tables inside the Eye-Slicing Room. Dr. Ellis informed me that the first part of the procedure would entail the cutting of the corneal flaps on one table, followed by their reshaping on the other. I guess "table" isn't quite the right term; I likened them to dentists' chairs that recline all the way back, with your head secured in a padded cradle to prevent movement.

Or escape.

I sat on the side of the first chair, shifted onto it and lowered my head back into the cradle. A nurse immediately hovered over me and told me she'd be putting numbing drops into my eyes. It felt like she emptied the whole bottle into both eyes, which was absolutely fine with me as I wanted them to be as numb as possible during the procedure -- I was still pretty nervous and a little fidgety at this point. The thing was, I couldn't feel my eyes going numb so I didn't know if the drops were working. I wanted to ask how long it would take for the drops to do their work, but didn't have a chance. Dr. Ellis rolled into view above me.

"Okay, we're going to work on your right eye first," he said in that same calm voice. "We're covering up your left eye, and I'm going to put this speculum in your right one." For those who don't know, an eye speculum is used to keep your eye from blinking -- basically, to hold it open like that scene in A Clockwork Orange. (I'll let you Google those images yourself.) Before I knew it, he'd applied the speculum in my eye -- and I didn't feel a thing. I'd had a fear that I'd try to blink and panic when I couldn't, but I didn't even have the desire to blink, probably thanks to the drops.

yes, these go into your eyes

And no, the Valium had not kicked in at this point.

Still, I was encouraged. The speculum had been a major concern for me and it didn't turn out badly at all so I took another breath, somewhat relieved. I must have looked freaky as hell with my eye all wide and unblinking and sh*t. hahah!

"You're going to feel a bit of pressure in your eye here," Dr. Ellis continued, "We're going to pull up the cornea a little bit so we can create the flap." The vision in my right eye then went dark as the machine descended and attached to it. I'd known about losing sight from reading about the procedure, so no surprises.

However, what came next was actually the strangest and most uncomfortable part of the procedure for me. In order to correct my vision, a laser is used to cut a circular flap in the cornea, which is then essentially peeled back so that another laser can reshape its interior portion. I heard a low whining/buzzing noise and knew the cutting had started, but what I didn't expect to feel was the cutting itself. Thankfully, there was no pain at all, but I could feel the laser slicing an arc around my cornea! It felt like a slight but very precise pressure traveling in a small circle. It must have lasted less than a minute, but the sensation was disquieting to say the least. Needless to say I fidgeted a little and had trouble figuring out what to do with my hands.

The machine lifted off my eyeball and vision came back, but it was understandably very blurry and watery -- I'd just had a layer of my eye peeled away! Still, I experienced no pain whatsoever. Those drops are incredible. Dr. Ellis removed the speculum from my right eye and repeated the procedure on my left after liberally putting more drops in. I'd say this first part of the treatment took five or six minutes total.

After cutting my left corneal flap, they gently sat me upright and led me to the second chair nearby and put more drops in. I laid down in the chair and Dr. Ellis again covered my left eye and put the speculum in my right. "I know your vision is blurry, like you're underwater, but you're going to see some red lights. Concentrate on looking at the green one in the middle."

I can compare it to looking out of your windshield at a bunch of traffic lights on a very rainy and windy night without your wipers on. The green light is used to track eye movements (as it's impossible to keep it perfectly still throughout the entire procedure) and adjust the laser accordingly as it reshapes the cornea, going as far as to shut off if I looked anywhere but the green light. So to those of you who asked me if the laser would burn a hole in the side of my eye if I happened to foolishly look away, there's your answer. There were more low hums as I focused on staring at the blurry green light and the laser did its thing. This part was far less uncomfortable than the corneal slicing, and most of my anxiety had subsided at this point. My right eye was done in a minute or two. Dr. Ellis swung the laser up and away, then took some kind of tweezer and laid the flap back over my newly-shaped cornea. He then repeated the process with my left eye after more drops.

The entire procedure probably took about 10-12 minutes. After Dr. Ellis was finished replacing the flap on my right eye, he led me to one more machine to quickly check my corneas, which apparently were doing fine. My vision was still quite watery, but I could read things without glasses!! A nurse led me slowly out of the room, and I scheduled a follow-up appointment the next day. At the front desk, I was given some extremely stylish wrap-around shades to wear for the next few days to protect my new eyes from dust, wind and other irritants.

My mom drove us to the hotel where we'd stay the night, and as we were taking our bags and cooler to our room, the Valium finally hit. My knees buckled and I walked sideways into a wall! I later learned that the Valium is primarily administered to help you sleep after the procedure (essentially to keep your eyes closed to promote corneal healing), and not to relieve anxiety. The rest of the night was a complete fog. I slept deeply for the duration, groggily waking only to eat a Panda Express takeout dinner and at various other times to put in a three-part regimen of antibiotic, steroid and saline drops.

I'd been informed that I might experience some normal post-surgery pain -- after all, my eyes had been sliced open and parts burned away -- but all I really felt was a slight, annoying scratching sensation in my left eye that turned out to be part of the healing process. My vision in the follow-up appointment the next morning was tested at "a weak 20/20" for both eyes, which makes me really happy. I mean, I really can't ask for much more than perfect vision! There will be some minor fluctuation in sharpness over the next three months as my corneas heal completely and stabilize, but overall I am doing very well!

I'll wrap up my LASIK experience in Part 03.

The Gift Of Sight: Part 01.

It's been almost three weeks since I went in to get my vision corrected via LASIK so I thought I'd write about the experience, in three parts, while it's still relatively fresh in my mind. This entry provides a bit of background on the day of the surgery.

I woke up early on the day of my surgery, 11 June, excited and slightly anxious. I'd started on an antibiotic eye-drop regimen the day before in order to prep my eyes for the procedure and I made sure to put a couple more drops in after getting up. My appointment wasn't until 2:40 that afternoon, which gave us a decent cushion of time to get to Kansas City from Hays. I wouldn't be able to drive immediately after the surgery, but luckily my mom had some business to attend to in Columbia, so she volunteered to accompany me to the clinic. We left at around 9:30 that morning and made the 4-hour trip east to KC without incident.

We got to the LasikPlus clinic on time that afternoon. At this point I was a bit more nervous but still doing pretty well. I checked in at the front desk, where I was given some paperwork to fill out and sign: consent forms, liability waivers and an acknowledgment of understanding of the procedure. After returning the forms, I was asked if I wanted a Valium tablet. You can probably guess my answer to that question ...

sweet surrender

I hung out in the waiting room watching HGTV for a few minutes, and was then ushered into an exam room to meet with Dr. Ellis, who I'd met with during my initial consultation two weeks prior. He'd be performing the surgery on me and wanted to know if I had any final questions or concerns. He was quite reassuring and confident -- which is what you really want the guy who'll be cutting up and reshaping your eyes to be. We chatted for a little bit, and then I found myself in another waiting room adjacent to the Eye-Slicing Room*, where the procedure would be taking place. Dr. Ellis then said he'd see me in a few minutes, then walked into the Room with the patient scheduled before me.

The Eye-Slicing Room had glass walls so I (along with other patients scheduled that day) could see the equipment and medical team as they worked. There were even monitors strategically placed so that I could watch the procedure itself if I wanted. Unsurprisingly I chose not to watch, but for some reason the lady who was scheduled to go after me did. So basically all I heard for ten minutes was "Omigod. OHHH! What's that. Oh God. Oh God what's --- OHHH!"

Valium or not, never in my life have I wanted to slap someone so badly.

Instead, I concentrated on the benefits of the procedure instead of psyching myself out, and did sneak glances inside the Room now and then to see a general view. Mostly it was just of the woman laying on her back with equipment over much of her face, and Dr. Ellis at the head of the operating table controlling the machines. Bright lights emanated from the equipment. Really not much going on from a bystander's point of view; and the patient seemed composed and calm. Which were good signs.

LASIK surgery only takes about 10-15 minutes total for both eyes, so it wasn't long before Dr. Ellis finished up. The staff swung the equipment away and helped the patient up to a sitting position, then led her over to sit at one more machine, presumably to check if the procedure had been successful. After a brief exam, she was walked out of the Room and joined by the person who accompanied her to the clinic. Dr. Ellis then walked out and ushered the patient scheduled after me into the small exam room I'd just been in, to give her the chance to ask final questions. Five minutes or so passed, then he re-emerged and called my name.

Into the Eye-Slicing Room I went.

Read Parts 02 and 03.

*Obviously not its real name, but holy CROW it just seemed so appropriate at the time.

Laser-Assisted In Situ Keratomileusis.

This morning will be the last time I need glasses to read the display on my clock radio, or for anything else at all for that matter. This afternoon I am placing my vision in the hands of a surgeon. Soooo here's praying my procedure goes well.

I'm planning on practicing lots of archery

I'm really excited and extremely nervous at the same time. I'm glad they prescribe Valium right before the surgery 'cause I'm going to need it. But it is a huge understatement to say that I'm looking forward to seeing the world for the first time without the glasses I've worn all my life.

Ran, meet LASIK. Wish me luck.

New Specs.

Since it's much cheaper to make them there, I got a brand-new pair of glasses from the Philippines courtesy of family connections:

anti-myopia device

They have some funky, modern design elements that I like, from the bold flash of red on the arms to the split design on the lateral edges of the frame. As with all new prescription glasses, they'll take a day or two to get used to while my eyes adjust -- perspective is always a bit skewed at first, making me feel like I'm swimming in a prism. (Yes, I'm freaking blind.)

I like 'em though. Happy Monday!